Feeling old.

Assalamualaikum, its 12:59 AM. oh it's 1 AM already.

Finally. some renovations to my blog because it's better this way ! I love it, so white and pale, so aesthetics pftt kekonon. How are you doing people? Me? Weekend had already passed. Another weekend. So fast. Time is so fast moving. You will be like " urgh monday blues" from "eh, friday already ?" real quick. People, dont waste your time. ( but im wasting a lot, actually.) I need to do something but I dont even know why I ended up here, ugh my life. I have so much things to do but I still have time to do something unrelated with my studies. Gahh. Idk what is happening to me. Lately I feel so lazy to do things. Last Thursday I skipped class because......why not? hehe evil laugh. I swear thats the first and last. I need to chin up, find my study spirit. It had been already the middle of the sem , guys. Can you believe it? My foundation life will be over in a few weeks! Well, not a few but still one month and several weeks left but hey whatever- i am finally done with foundation !

Not really finally tho. It is only one year. It feels really really short. Thats why Im feeling old. Done with my foundation means I'll celebrate my 19th birthday. God, 19 already ah you? Still dont act like one la. and I'll continue my studies in degree. what the heck im not ready T^T and then I'll celebrate my 20th birthday. Dammmit the number two infront of the zero. Youre a big girl already, stop crying. ( Eheck no it is a hobby) I seriously dont feel like growing up. I havent do much to my parents and my family and to the world. I did not even care about whats happening around me in the past, except for crying over some stupid guys and reminiscing about my fucked up love life. Which I had lost all and have no more, at this time being. Now I am being so jealous to all people that managed to further their studies abroad. So so much. Sometimes I wonder why I cant be like them? If only I put some effort, I can do it. Im not too bad in studies, I am just lazy and donut care. Dang you the old me youre so ignorant af. But actually, Im still ignorant. Let's not waste any time regretting about the past, better focus at the present, and future.

I need to have good pointer for this sem, and enoying my foundation life before it ends. Need to tick m all my wishlist ( after I got my allowance ) ( Cepatlah elaun masuk T-T) and yeah end it perfectly. And go home yassssssss. Life is good people, life is good. ( not in denial)

I realize that people come and go in life. It's normal. They cannot stay there forever, life doesnt work that way. Appreciate all the people around you today because they will not be around you someday. And trust me when they are actually gone, without you wanting it or without you realizing it, trust me that is better. Dont blame anyone about that, and most important, dont blame Allah SWT. Because He knows what is best for you. He knows that you can handle the feeling of losing, He knows you are ready at that time. What doesnt kill you makes you stronger, indeed. He knows that is the right time, people. Have faith in Him, have faith in yourself. Love yourself. Know your self worth, bring the best out of you. Keep those monsters and demons inside and caged them up like, for real. Stop worrying about petty things, they dont worth your attention at all. Enjoy your life, youre still young.

Inspired by Yuna @ her tumblr, i swallowed all her wise words there :)

Byebye. 

mynn

1:27 AM